Tuesday, February 26, 2008

Thing 3's new song

They tried to make me go to preschool, but I say no no no
Yes I get to paint, but when I'm not a saint they say no no no
I ain't got the time, and I already know how to rhyme
They tried to make me go to preschool, but I won't go go go

I'd rather be at home to play instead of wasting my whole day
'cuz there's nothing they can teach me
that I can't learn from watching Sesame Street
snack is carrot sticks, when I only want a chocolate kiss

They tried to make me go to preschool, but I say no no no
Yes I get to paint, but when I'm not a saint they say no no no
I ain't got the time, and I already know how to rhyme
They tried to make me go to preschool, but I won't go go go

The girl said, "Why you think you here?" I said, "I got no idea."
'Cuz I'm gonna, I'm gonna miss Diego and they don't let me mix the Play-doh.
Said I think you're just too bold. I said, "Teacher, you're too old."

They try to make me to go preschool, but I say no no no
Yes I get to paint, but when I'm not a saint they say no no no

I don't want circle time again. I just want to play dress-up with friends
I don't want to spent time on the mat just to show I can count to ten
and repeat my colors and shapes just like a well-trained, signing ape.

They try to make me go to preschool, but I say no no no
Yes I get to paint, but when I'm not a saint they say no no no
I ain't got the time and I already know how to rhyme
They try to make me go to preschool, but I won't go go go

Monday, February 11, 2008

I Need a Wife

She doesn't have to be pretty or charming. Just smart. And very cheerful about the prospect of picking up after me -- the Hubbins' complaining is tiresome.

Seriously, I'm in the office [warning -- lawyer stuff to come. Talk among yourselves], trying to muddle through all of the ramifications of a notice of removal filed in response to an amended pleading, in a case where we've already moved for default for failure to plead in the state court and already served all kinds of written discovery, and where my boss wants me to go for the jugular. Now, please.

There is probably a simple answer to all of this, and the simple answer seems to be, "Haha! All of the deadlines are reset by the removal notice. So have fun refiling your discovery after the 26(f) conference." But I don't want to concede this and I don't want to run it past the boss (who isn't here anyway, so I can't sneak it out of him by having a broader discussion of the case). I don't want to discuss it with one of the young'ns because I'm supposed to be more experienced and such. And my eyes hurt and I don't want to read any more.

And the TV in the conference room doesn't work, so I'm missing the Westminster Kennel Club dog show. Or I'm too much of a freaking luddite to figure out how to work it -- very plausible. Three years ago, I offered a co-worker lunch if he would make my stereo system work. I wired the whole thing up, but it just wouldn't make noise out come of the speakers. He pushed a button, took a step back and regarded the machine, and noise magically came out of the speakers.

In the analog world, noise comes out immediately. In the digital world, you might have to wait 5 seconds. I felt like the ape that got its head bashed in at the beginning of 2001. . . if that ape pointed out the monolith to the basher, gave him the long bone, demonstrated the whacking motion, and then had to buy him lunch.

I digress.

If I had a really smart wife, maybe one with lots of complex commercial litigation experience, I could ask her these questions. And she would chirpily respond, citing FRCP and Title 28, while fetching my knitting and a glass of cabernet. And she wouldn't think I was too lazy to look it up myself.

Thursday, February 07, 2008

To my girls...



Create your custom cookie at blinkyou.com

A la recherche de yarn stores perdu

Knit Together, Stamford, CT. Great selection. Nice staff (although I found the newsletter grousing about those smallish humans some of us insist upon bringing around a bit much). In my job searches, I made a point of stopping in for a "pick me up" or "congratulatory skein" on every occasion. I could never understand why they were closed on Mondays, when my best chance of wandering down to Stamford for court was on Monday. They stocked noro near the front, which always made me happy. (pretty colors. oooh. pretty colors.) When I came to my final interview with Le Firm, I stopped in for a quick fix. But when I started working at Le Firm, 2 months later, they were gone. RIP February 2007.

Selma's, Southbury, CT. I did not have much opportunity to stop by this store, but I made it there a few times after runs to Hartford. My first trip was after a CT Bar Young Lawyers Section executive committee retreat, located in a hotel a few buildings down. It was located in a sprawling retirement community and doubled as a post office. I think I bought my first malabrigo there, and still have a beautiful purple skein I bought last winter while I was just wild about Knitty's Calorimetry. RIP some time in 2007.

Knits Incredible, NYC. This one still cracks me up. I went to college down the street from this store and I wandered in a few times. At the time, I thought Yarn=Wintuk Caron. And my price point was about $1/skein. I never purchased anything in this store. I would walk in, look at the cubbies of yarny goodness and choke on the prices -- they wanted like $5 for these puny little balls of Ford knows what. I never touched anything, lest the Upper East Side Ladies Who Lunch and, Apparently, Knit yell, "UNCLEAN!" I knew I couldn't pass for anything but a City University student. I drove past it a year ago and saw that it was still open, so I made a special trip after the NYU Law Alumni luncheon on 2/1. Now that I can pass for a proper patron, I thought I would share my story and buy a skein of some "amuse main" for $20. But the store is no more.

Two Sisters, Waterbury, CT. See post, the yarn store that time forgot from some time in 2006. I'll find the exact date. When I went there again (after my lungs cleared) a few months later, it was gone.

That yarn store on maple avenue that burned down in the late 90s, Danbury, CT. I was only in there once. Made a b-line to the sale cubby. Bought a few balls of black cotton fingering weight yarn. I still have them and have no use for them whatsoever. After it burned down, there was some talk of reopening, but it never came to fruition. My first law firm represented the new owners of the building in their question for approval to operate their church in the building. I wrote a letter in support of their application stating that the city would be in violation of the Religious Land Use and Institutionalized Persons Act (Ruh-LOO-pah) if they didn't let this church locate itself in a place where there was no parking. I went to the public hearing and was shocked to see how freaked out the Zoning Board of Appeals was over the prospect of being called onto the mat by a bunch of harmless church folk. My analysis wasn't even 100% sound...

Knitting Pleasures, Brookfield, CT. I got to think about this one a little bit more. I bought some sock yarn there, and some off-white slubby stuff that sounds icky, but made a really nice shell and wrap that I wore to several occasions and still do sometimes. The store sold yarn on cones by the oz, which seems exotic but is actually rather quaint. I never mustered up the gumption to try buying yarn that way. It's like loose tea -- requires too much thought and what if you really just like Lipton? I don't know when the store opened, but it was around in the late 90s-early 00s, when all the big comfy couch, latte and yarn emporia started opening, yet it was this cramped, un-ironically-unhip place -- it was either 5 years ahead of the times or 15 years behind. I couldn't tell and they didn't stay opened long enough for the rest of the world to develop a burning desire for 70s-esq acrylic baby sweater/pant/booty sets. One day I drove past, wanted to fondle the fiber and maybe buy me some of that "off the cone" stuff. But there were gone.

That evil one in Westport, CT. The name will come to me. They did needlepoint too. The Hook and Needle. Located near my midwife's office. This place was the epitome of snotty yarn store. My first of two visits was early in my knitting career. It was the first time I tried buying off my husband with yarny goodness. I got the idea that if I spent a large sum on a sweater for him, he couldn't complain about my smaller purchases. (The arms were way too small and he's not that gullible. The quest for spousal complicity continues.) I was completely intimidated going into the store, but I knew they stocked the brand I needed (and the color too -- I was a SLAVE to the pattern back then). The bins had strange markings, like "wpi" and other secret codes. When I asked a sales person what the "wpi" meant she sniffed, "wraps per inch" and walked away. Uh...OK. I had heard of dye lot from my Mom, so I just grabbed the requisite number of skeins in the requisite brand in the requisite color, paid and left before they found me out as an interloper and snatched all my wool back. I got a great deal on a bag of purple merino wool worsted the second and last time I went there. I gave it to Mom as a gift. Dunno if she ever made anything out of it, although we picked out a pattern for her. I was not sad when they closed.

So many memories.

Wednesday, February 06, 2008

What did she expect???

Thing 1, as of late, has become obsessed with the idea of learning Japanese. She, like many others, wants to learn Japanese so she can read manga and watch anime in their original language. (What about peace, love and understanding???)

So, when Thing 1 called me at work last night, after 8:00 p.m., and demanded that I pick up a "Japanese learning device" on the way home, then sent me an email that states, "don't forget to get the Japanese learning device!!!!", and then accosted me when I walked in the door to confirm that I got the "Japanese learning device", what did she possibly expect?

That I would actually procure a object that would aid her in learning Japanese? Or that I would wrap aluminum foil around a collander, stick forks out of the top, and instruct in the proper use? (Wear at all times, except when sleeping.)

Apparently she thought the former. But after 10 minutes of self-pity, she decided it was funny.

Thing 2 loved it, tried it on, and started speaking Spanish. I probably have to play around with the forks, like rabbit ear antennae, to get the Japanese frequency.


Pix to come.

Labels: